What are you pretending not to know?

Judy Tsuei El Nido

I'm coming to you from Puerto Princesa in the Philippines on the way to El Nido with my daughter...

The moment we arrived at my best-friend-from-junior-high's-house, a red dragonfly hovered in front of our car.

The Universe was telling me I'm in flow — even though it didn't necessarily feel like it...

Our first flight from Taiwan was delayed, causing us to miss our second one, which meant that not only did we have to stay in Manila overnight, but I also had to pay to book a new ticket the next day (and spent over an hour with the airline personnel figuring out why I had to shoulder the responsibility for things beyond my control).

Even at the counter, feeling frustrated, tired, and hungry, I stood there highlighting my copy of A Course in Miracles, while the ticket agent went to talk to her supervisor, my daughter listening toThe Magic Treehouse series beside me. 

I kept repeating to myself, "Everything is working out FOR me. I trust you, Universe. Show me how Your magic will unfold."

It would be easy to make a story about how maybe I wasn't supposed to be there...

Just like it would be easy to make a story about how maybe I'm not good at love, because my marriage isn't working out...

But, that's me judging myself from my limited consciousness, when what if this was precisely what I needed to get to the next grand phase of my life?

By the time we got to our hotel room, I was exhausted — but beyond the kind that involves waking up at odd hours to catch flights or not being able to rest well from neck-drop in napping on the plane.

It was the kind of 'tired' that comes from realizing that once we arrived, my whole entire self (mental, energetic, spiritual, physical) could surrender into THIS being the real next segment of our lives. 

Solo mamahood.
Post-divorce.

I wanted to take Wilder to the pool. I wanted to take her back down to the yummy restaurant in the hotel to get dessert. I wanted to do any number of things, but the only thing I could do was lie next to her and sleep, sleep, sleep while she watched a movie. 

Getting to the Philippines for me marks a real next-step separation from my husband, because my intention for this trip is to find myself again, so that I know precisely how to move forward in my life for myself and my daughter.

My friend who's hosting us at her home and at her resort is my best friend from junior high. We haven't seen each other in over 10 years and yesterday, while riding to the local organic farm, her two kids and mine playing in the backseat, we realized that we've known each other since we were 12, which means that we've been friends for almost 30 years!

She's actually the person who told me to start blogging a couple of decades ago, and who sold her extremely successful blog for a mint to The Knot.

She's known me from my most awkward teenage years. 
She's known my family from our messiest days. 
She's even met numerous long-term boyfriends. 

All this history, her personal success with writing and sharing, and the fact that she's a mama too, makes her the perfect person to help me flow forward into who I'm becoming.

In our conversation last night, she helped me realize truths I haven't wanted to admit to myself. And now, armed with that freedom of awareness, I can move on like never before.

We all have these divinely timed angels in our lives.

Who's showing up for you?


Sign up for my #FreshFridays newsletters straight to your inbox.

It’s where you’ll get my best finds of the week to support you in learning how to #BeWildlyYou.

[LISTEN]

Abraham Hicks...

I have a whole spiritual playlist on YouTube for all the goodies that I find, and the latest listen from this morning is perfect for understanding why the most severe challenges and contrasts in your life don't mean that you're not good at attracting what you want or that you've screwed up your vibe in some way.

Find out what Abraham Hicks says in this 7 minute audio about why these experiences serve you incredibly well, about how there's the "wanted" and "unwanted" in everything, and why you're not meant to become MORE guarded from these experiences — I like that it had a dragonfly on the image, too!

[LISTEN]

Our Wild Hearted Words Podcast

One of the things my junior high best friend said yesterday is, "This woman who came to the resort would share photos of her dream vacations with her husband, to the envy of so many other people, meanwhile she's confessing to us that he's mentally abusive to her."

We need more REAL in the world. We need more authenticity. We need more kindness and Light.

Listen to our podcast for an honest conversation about the stories you tell yourself (a.k.a. mindset), the stories you tell the world (a.k.a. entrepreneurialism and platform-building, and the stories you tell your children (a.k.a. conscious parenthood).

[YOUR WILD HEARTED CHALLENGE]

What are you pretending not to know?
Here's the card I pulled this morning...

You're at a stalemate. You have to make a decision whether or not to face the Light.

I have a lot of truths I have to admit to myself in healing my marriage, things that I haven't wanted to look at, because I was afraid it'd mean something about myself. 

Like, how could a strong and smart woman who's on this path of consciousness have gotten herself into a relationship where I've allowed myself to be talked to or treated a certain way? And, what have I done that's unkind in turn?

What stalemate are you facing right now? What freedom lies on the other side of opening up to Truth?

Judy Tsuei