You are not perfect. But, you can be whole.
Those are the things I'm seeking right now, so I love that I stumbled upon a Suze Orman double-episode on Oprah's Super Soul Sessions that talks all about women and money.
Suze doesn't mince words.
She says you can't have any power if you don't have a handle on your financial situation — and this includes if you have a financial advisor making investments for you, but you don't know what those investments are.
She dives in deep about how a woman's power is intimately intertwined with money and now, given where I am in the midst of my divorce, I can see how this is radically so.
I'll be perfectly honest with you — I grew up knowing NOTHING about money other than how quickly and devastatingly you could get into debt.
My father is currently 73 and still working manual labor with the construction company he owns, because of the debt he and my mother accumulated from one failed entrepreneurial endeavor after another.
You can imagine then, the baggage that I carry, when I readily forget that most companies require seven years for real sustainable success, so it's easy for me to make mishaps or learning curves in building my own endeavor mean something about my ability to thrive in business...
And in money.
Because yes, I earned enough as a consultant when I was 26 to live off of my savings quite easily for the next 10 years.
That was time I allotted to myself to heal from my strict Chinese upbringing. To heal from my eating disorder. To learn about life, adventure, and who I truly wanted to be, rather than who I thought I had to become.
It brought me all the way to a small cluster of islands in the middle of the Pacific, where I became a mother.
That money allowed me to be free, until that money went away.
The one thing I didn't do during those 10 years was to become smarter about how to manage my money like a true boss.
Like a real CEO.
Like the owner of my own fucking life.
I thought I'd have a partner who could help me navigate, who I could build a nest egg and a future with for both myself and my daughter.
But, life had other plans.
Ones that are catapulting me to finally owning and stepping into my power without any excuses whatsoever and nothing else to hide behind.
I have been repeating the mantra, "Everything is working out for me. Everything is working out for me. Everything is working out for me." And, I'm grateful to have a close circle of wise ones who echo this sentiment as they reflect to me, "You can't see it right now, because you're so IN IT, but everything that's happening is for your greatest favor."
My husband recently sent me an email that he's no longer going to support me financially in any way. I sat with this for a moment.
The Universe was again, working FOR me, because in my heart, I'd already decided that I would do everything in my power to be fully independent in every way. I'd been the primary breadwinner for our family when we were living in Austin, so I know I'm capable of doing it again for myself and my daughter. So, this email was simply the proverbial cow getting pushed off the cliff, a parable I talked about in my Facebook livestream.
One by one, God is removing any last obstacles that I've used as excuses to hide behind rather than stepping boldly into my own power.
Even today in meditation, I felt Kwan Yin stand before me and call me to my greatness.
Now, there truly IS nothing else to hide behind, because whatever stories and experiences that haven't been serving me are being ripped up, so I can draft a much more empowering narrative.
I get to write my life moving forward on an entirely new blank page.
And, I can show my daughter how to do this, too.
Suze said, on the stage at the Apollo before women who needed to have drinks before the show to tackle the topic of money, that you shouldn't want your children to avoid making your same mistakes.
Instead, you should WANT them to do as you've done.
To do so well for yourself that they are eager to step into such greatness for themselves.
That was a complete reframe for me in my parenting and my life, especially around finances.
I don't want my daughter to say, "I don't want to make the same mistakes my mom did," the way I did with my own parents.
I want her to say, "I LOVE what my mom created and I can't wait to do that for myself and maybe my children, too."
That's a much better reality to live into.
Want to create that with me?
Listen to Suze...
When I was in the Philippines, my friend's husband, who's literally read every business book there is, said to me, "When you can take a weakness in your business and turn it into a strength, you've really succeeded."
It stuck in my mind, because one of my weaknesses has always been a fear about money.
It's not for lack of making it. I know how to make money.
It's that there's a subliminal underlying belief that maybe I'm not worth it, so I spend more than I need to or let it slip out of my fingers somehow.
Knowing this, and the year ahead, my own personal #MondayMasterclass is going to be transforming my fear around finances into absolute rooted abundance and wealth.
That's why I want you to listen to Suze's two podcast episodes, then go to her website, SuzeU.com, because she's giving away an online course that she'd normally charge $59 for for FREE, since she wants women everywhere to thrive.
She even says in the episodes, "Tell every woman you know about this free code, so that they can have access to this information too, and not have to send me another heartbreaking email about their situations with money."
Here's the site: https://suzeu.com
Here's the code: WOMEN
Maybe I was finally primed to hear this message, because I want to create such remarkable success for myself that I can give back to the women who are in much tougher situations than I am, ones where they're despairing and feeling beyond powerless.
That my daughter will know what kind of woman her mother is.
Owning your money is owning your power.
And, power attracts more money.
Lack of power that repels — people, friendships, abundance.
If we really want to live into the #MeToo movement and create a generation of women who aren't violated in any way, it starts with the freedom to own your life by being able to feel safe, stable, and powerful in knowing you have the resources to take care of your every need — and that of your children.
This is a serious message. As Rachel Naomi Remen said, "Wholeness is never lost; it is only forgotten."
You don't have to be perfect on this journey of life. You simply have to remove the layers you've added on throughout your life that are covering your Truth.
Suze says in episode 1 that she, like me, firmly believes everything is working out for you to your greatest advantage.
"God isn't a taker; God is a giver," she touts from the stage, as she shares her remarkable journey to incredible wealth starting from watching her father run into a burning chicken shack restaurant to rescue his cash register, all their family's meager life savings, leading to third degree burns.
So, I want to know if you're in it with me.
Let's do this together...
Let's take back our power...
For us, and for future generations of women to come.
Are you in?
P.S. Please forward this email along to any women in your life who need to hear this right now. We all need one another.