I'm closing Wild Hearted Words.
It’s time to say ‘goodbye’.
Oops. I did it again.
I went and lived a bunch of life and in the middle of it, didn’t do the “right business thing” by staying steady and consistent in emailing you.
I know, I know — everything in online marketing says that consistency is key, but y’know what?
So is living your life!
Over the past few months, I’ve:
Filed for divorce the day before my birthday,
Been supporting my four-and-a-half-year-old daughter in navigating the grief of realizing the family she once knew is evolving into a new kind of normal,
Turned 41, then headed over to Palm Springs for a personal retreat,
Moved into a new apartment in San Diego with ocean views,
Picked up a full-time gig working remotely for an award-winning company in L.A., where I planned a meditation and live activation event at the Staples Center with the WNBA,
And, well, more.
Along the way, I’ve been assessing and reassessing what I want to do with Wild Hearted Words…
The truth is, my own wild heart and words have changed.
The day after my birthday, I drove to Palm Springs – the first place I ever took a solo trip when I was 26 – and as I got on the 111 highway, I knew it was time to close a few chapters…
I went to Palm Springs because I was craving the heat.
I needed more earth and grounding in my life, surprising even myself that for the first time in my ocean-loving life, I simply did NOT want to be near the water anymore.
After having my life be so fluid for the past five years, I needed real grounding...
For the first two days after arrival, I simply reveled in the warmth of the town and the luxuries of a modern hotel. Then, on the day I was supposed to drive back home, I awoke early and found the nearest hike to the backdrop of beige and brown mountains behind me.
I had actually forgotten to pack my running shoes, so I put on my flip-flops, slathered on sunblock, and smacked my way along the dirt path. Knowing I shouldn’t go too far before the blazing triple digit heat would soon hit, I found a large rock, sat upon it, placed my water bottle beside me, took off my shirt to cover my face for more shade, and breathed.
I started saying goodbye… to everything I had hoped for my marriage, for my ex-husband, for the family dynamic I thought I would create for my beautiful daughter. I accepted the breaking and the heartache of having her half the time. I let go of my expectations of what I thought a happily forever after would look like.
I then said goodbye to what I thought this company, Wild Hearted Words, would be, this energetic space I’d focused heart and soul into for the past few years. This culmination of all my left-brained marketing and branding expertise for the last two decades of my life. This endeavor I thought I would love building and I know I’m extremely good at, but realizing now, it’s simply not the kind of Good I was truly put on this planet for.
Goodbye to who I’ve been. Who I thought I had to become. And to the stories the little girl within me falsely believed were true, which led me to this point in my life now, where I mistakenly thought if I worked hard enough, I could create the perfectly safe life where someone outside of me would give me all the love and security I needed. I finally “got it” that it wasn’t about working harder or doing better. It was knowing I had value all along — a value I never had to prove to anyone, least of all me.
In the middle of the desert, when I finally opened my eyes and lifted my shirt, a dragonfly flew into my view.
For many years now, dragonflies have been the way the Universe tells me, “I see you. I hear you. I’ve got you.”
Confirmation and completion.
Speaking of completion… I’m “closing” Wild Hearted Words in its current form.
(If you’ve never heard of Lacy Phillips or Human Design, I highly recommend checking them both out.)
Jenna started a vegan bakery because substantially changing her diet helped heal her severe acne. There was a decent demand to what she was offering, especially because she was emerging on the scene when vegan treats weren’t yet a thing.
But, Jenna couldn’t understand why no matter how much hustle / grind / heart she put into it, her business simply wasn’t taking off the way that other women in her field were.
She was doing exactly the same things they were – potentially even offering a better product – but these other entrepreneurs were getting featured, making big bucks, and attracting an amazing amount of traction whereas she simply wasn’t.
She efforted hard. To no avail.
She finally decided to close her business.
She surrendered her ego to the unknown.
The answer wasn’t yet clear, but she took the leap of faith.
It turns out that she never achieved real success because there was another path more aligned to her gifts…
Jenna Zoe is now one of the world’s leading Human Design experts.
But, she couldn’t have gotten to her more fitting purpose if she didn’t let go and let God (or however you call your sense of Spirit).
That’s what I’m doing now...
I’m letting go.
I’m letting go in gratitude.
Life has been chock full of learning lessons this last half decade and I am trusting that there’s a greater purpose ahead.
If I keep showing up with as much presence as possible, I’ll find out why.
That ‘why’ will lead me to a greater Why.
Sometimes, we need to try things – and try them again, and again, and again –until we finally get the message…
Sometimes, we need to find ourselves asking, “How the FUCK did I get to this place in my life?” before we slowly crawl out of our darkness to blink our way into the Light.
Sometimes, we need to start over.
And sometimes, we simply won’t know until we let go.
Here’s to letting go of what Wild Hearted Words has been… it’ll become something else I’m sure, but for now, I have to live my way into that new clarity, so I’m saying goodbye to this iteration of my company.
If you’ve ever wanted to work with me for branding, storytelling, marketing, or intuitive sessions, I’ll be accepting clients until August 15th — then I’m no longer offering this type of work.
After August 15th, I welcome you to follow along with me on this wild hearted ride as I share what I’m learning via bi-weekly emails (similar to my old #FreshFriday round-up emails)… you won’t have to do anything to stay subscribed — just keep clickin’ on my messages when you get them in your inbox! You can also stay up-to-date with the magical ways life and work are unfolding through my Facebook group.
I hope that you’re inspired to keep living your truth and speaking up for your worth.
Thank you for being here with me. It has truly been an honor! I hope we’ll stay connected for the journeys ahead… feel free to hit ‘reply’ if you have any questions!